July 6, 2023

Today is my son Alan’s 46th birthday. I called him, giving him the highest praise and love I possibly could. I wish to convey the greatest part of being 3D to 5D human – to not hold back from giving and receiving LOVE.
I’ve written, for at least 20 years, about our Divinity. Thoughts of being Divine have been filling my consciousness again lately – the truth that I AM, your are, every human is (except reptilians and clones) A Divine Being. A living aspect of God.
And I’m realizing that from birth, up to age 18, all human beings deserve to be protected, loved, nurtured, and guided by our parents and tribe – basically to be good, to always choose do the right thing and explore personal creativity, without ridicule or shaming. Sound Of Freedom shows the abomination and horror when during those ages children aren’t free to live in this protective loving positive nurturing family environment.
And then I contemplated something that I’ve messed up with – my ego attachment to being a self-proclaimed “Awakened – more spiritually intelligent” person, somehow entitled to freely exert my will or righteous beliefs on others – like kindly lecturing my “woke” son Alan, or sometimes you, or anyone who’s over 18 years old. Not allowed.
After “leaving the nest” every person naturally organically assumes their own Authority. Should/can make their own decisions. They/we have, in pure consciousness, birthed ourselves here on earth into a 3D life reality – with our own personal presets of encounters to experience and play out. We could have decided to experience being a lover or a hater, a healer or a killer, a genius or mentally ill – it’s always each person’s Inner Authority choice to have whatever 3D experience they need, for them to own the lesson, to personally learn from each one and to then move on. There are no time limits. Possibly they need to become addicted to one lesson or another, and stay stuck in it for years. Perhaps the lesson isn’t entirely for them. Most often family and friends do interfere, panic, and become impatient viewing their loved one’s addiction, not able to see that person’s Divinity, injecting the “problem” with their fear and disappointment, over expressing unconditional love – thus giving the addicted person’s pain more power, to continue its expression.
In my personal healing process, I’m accepting that I was born into my 3D life for the very personal particular lessons that only I need to learn about and heal. Like I said – it seems that I was born to be a lone wolf artist/creator. It really is no one’s business to judge or decide if me expressing being me or you expressing being you is a wonderful thing or a fucked up thing. In living my life I’ve learned about what doesn’t feel good or right, so that now I would now rather feel better, more aware and self-loving, whether anyone notices or not. I’m considering that any judgments (mine or anyones) of my past or present behavior – is just silly made-up nonsense. My continuing to accept my Divinity is most important in my senior years.
As is my job as an elder “Light-worker;” which is to love without judging whoever comes into my life, no matter what. Especially to never forget that whether or not my son Alan is ignorantly following the woke agenda, unknowingly supporting evil – I’m to only see him as a man with a beautiful heart and to love him unconditionally. I’ll strive to keep reminding myself to see Everyone this way – in the light of love.
I see you with a wonderful loving heart. Most humans have loving hearts, though unaware of their Divinity. Maybe only 1 or 2% of the people are totally lost, mentally sick and brainwashed to be an advocate of Satanic evil; perverted pedophiles abusing our children or hoarding thieves. God please help them to stop it.
I keep thinking that since I do create my reality, why am I creating, insisting on, a “being alone” reality? Is it possible to create a happier reality, to bring love, at least a loving woman companion, into my life?
Two days ago, I got something stuck in my eye. I was in so much pain – it wouldn’t wash out. It exhausted me. And then the next afternoon, I finally accepting no choice but to and headed out driving the back streets Cabo – so hard to see while driving – searching for an hour, either they couldn’t help me or it was closed, until I finally found an eye doctor, who opened my upper inner eyelid and with a microscope light and mini tweezers pulled the stuck cactus piece out. Ich! It looked gnarly. Scratched my lens. He said I shouldn’t be driving – no choice but to drive home. Anything like that, a fall or cut, could suddenly happen at any time while living alone. It didn’t feel right.
I’m beginning to realize that having a loving companion living with me would be so good in so many ways. We’ll see what happens.

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